Over the weekend we went to a party hosted by a couple of fabulous lesbians who live in the most exclusive building in all of South Beach. Their designer had just finished working on the place for a full year, and it looked amazing. They had an enormous spread set out on a kitchen island roughly the size of Manhattan, and they pulled out bottle after bottle of delicious, interesting wines.

(For what it’s worth, we took a Cloudy Bay Sauvignon Blanc with one of our Thom Loafman prost!cards. That earned us a good laugh … and hopefully a return invitation.)

We thought everything was pretty close to perfect, until one of our friends complained that the music wasn’t loud enough and the lights were too bright. Then someone chimed in that the crowd was too gay, and someone else, whom I didn’t really know, said there wasn’t enough seating on the enormous, oceanfront balcony.

Wow, tough crowd, I thought, making a mental of note of three people who definitely won’t get invited to our next party.

But more than that, with the holidays approaching and multiple social events scheduled every weekend, I made myself a promise: Not one negative word about any party I attend. Politics and the economy are still open for criticism, but no negative party talk, including the:

• Food
• Drink
• Setting
• Crowd

Call it my pre-New Year’s resolution. I’m going to spread only good cheer and good vibes this year.

Unless there’s no wine. Then all bets are off.

Prost!